Thought I would share this hilarious letter sent in by an OKC reader to the Gazette in response to a letter about the benefits of extending daylight savings time to year round in OK:
"Mankind shouldn't have ever screwed around with daylight at all. And this has biblical support that has been overlooked by roughly everyone. Facts: Everything to do with sunlight was installed way back in the beginning of everything - by God. Anyone can authenticate this. It's in the Bible. When God said, Let there be light, he specified standard time - and he didn't want anybody messing with it, ever. Check it out."
The thought that religious fanatics could be anti-daylight savings time never entered my mind as it is just so far out there crazy but apparently God hates daylight savings time...and gays.
And BTW, a quick Wikipedia search shows that the ancient Egyptians, not God, invented timekeeping devices. Anyone can authenticate this.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011
OMG Snow!
OKC is expected to get a dusting of snow today (less than one inch) and it has everyone freaked out at the mall, the shelves empty at the grocery stores, and schools already announcing closures. My sources here tell me that instead of plowing roads, they shut them down until they can get to them. Can't wait to mock all of my co-workers tomorrow with tales of me sitting in a bar drinking and watching football during snowpocalpse 2010 in the Northeast. My biggest problem was having to dig a 6-pack of beer out of a snowdrift on the deck.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Do Oklahomans Eat Squirrels?
Last night at happy hour one of my Oklahoma coworkers confessed to our Connecticut boss that he had eaten squirrel on more than one occassion causing our boss to nearly fall off her bar stool. When I relayed this hilarious story to yet another Oklahoma coworker, instead of the expected shock I got "oh she just doesn't understand Oklahoma."
So this got me thinking: ARE THEY REALLY EATING SQUIRRELS HERE?
A quick google search turned up a little more info:
In the U.S., especially in the South, the tradition goes way back, and only started becoming less common in recent decades. "Squirrels were a staple in the Alabama diet for decades as late as the 1940s," says Michael C. Bolton at AL.com, and "the squirrel was the No. 1 hunted species in Alabama until 1972," when deer took over the top spot. "We've eaten it since colonial days," says Smith. "In fact sometimes, during hard times, a lot of people primarily subsisted from squirrel meat, just for want of anything better."
So this got me thinking: ARE THEY REALLY EATING SQUIRRELS HERE?A quick google search turned up a little more info:
In the U.S., especially in the South, the tradition goes way back, and only started becoming less common in recent decades. "Squirrels were a staple in the Alabama diet for decades as late as the 1940s," says Michael C. Bolton at AL.com, and "the squirrel was the No. 1 hunted species in Alabama until 1972," when deer took over the top spot. "We've eaten it since colonial days," says Smith. "In fact sometimes, during hard times, a lot of people primarily subsisted from squirrel meat, just for want of anything better."
I don't care if it is supposed to taste like chicken (which my coworker did in fact confirm) I'm not accepting any invitations for home cooked meals here in OK.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Putting Christ back in Christmas
Bravo Oklahoma City! Not enough cities have the balls to boldly scream Christianity as loudly as you. Everyone should have a couple of crosses shining brightly in their face as they stumble home from the bars as a reminder to repent and be saved. Those caught saying “Happy Holidays” should immediately be stoned to death. Just as Jesus intended.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Things I Miss!
After spending a week and a half in the Northeast (CT, NYC, Boston) there are definitely some Northeast things that I miss now that I have been back in OKC a week. I had tears in my eyes while sitting on the plane at Logan getting ready to fly back west. So here are the things I miss (besides the obvious family and friends):
Rude people: Now this is an odd one since I didn’t like them when I lived in the Northeast but after 4 months of people at the airport asking me where I’m flying and people on the elevator asking me how my day was, I was feeling a little Stepford Wives. How refreshing when the woman working the counter at Alamo in Boston started barking policies at me and didn’t give a shit where I was going or how my day was.
Good radio stations: As soon as I got in my rental in Boston and turned on the radio; I knew I wasn’t in Oklahoma anymore. No country stations, or gospel music or people complaining about the government’s war on religion. No ads for classes on the Constitution. Hey Oklahomans, you would have received a free education on the Constitution if you hadn’t dropped out in elementary school.
Jesus free cars: For an entire week and a half in the Northeast, the only Jesus sign I saw was a bumper sticker on a car: “When Jesus said love thy neighbor, I think he meant try not to kill them.” Far cry from the cars here that not only put Jesus bumper stickers on the back, but actually paint Jesus signs right on to the car!
5 more weeks until I get back to normal again!
Rude people: Now this is an odd one since I didn’t like them when I lived in the Northeast but after 4 months of people at the airport asking me where I’m flying and people on the elevator asking me how my day was, I was feeling a little Stepford Wives. How refreshing when the woman working the counter at Alamo in Boston started barking policies at me and didn’t give a shit where I was going or how my day was.
Good radio stations: As soon as I got in my rental in Boston and turned on the radio; I knew I wasn’t in Oklahoma anymore. No country stations, or gospel music or people complaining about the government’s war on religion. No ads for classes on the Constitution. Hey Oklahomans, you would have received a free education on the Constitution if you hadn’t dropped out in elementary school.
Jesus free cars: For an entire week and a half in the Northeast, the only Jesus sign I saw was a bumper sticker on a car: “When Jesus said love thy neighbor, I think he meant try not to kill them.” Far cry from the cars here that not only put Jesus bumper stickers on the back, but actually paint Jesus signs right on to the car!
5 more weeks until I get back to normal again!
Monday, November 1, 2010
An Inconvenient State
I write this at 39,000 feet up in the air and Oklahoma City at my back! Getting out of the airport this morning I was reminded at just how inconvenient it is to live in OKC. The airport is somewhat small which would normally make flying easier. I guess if they had more than 5 security lanes for the thousands of people this morning or if security would drink a little coffee in the morning to get themselves moving a little quicker, that would be true. As it was I got to the airport an hour before my flight, snuck over to the alternate security not everyone knows about and STILL walked on to my plane just 15 minutes before take off. Surprisingly enough 4 other people walked on after me.
So what other inconveniences do people in OKC willingly live with besides almost missing their plane every time they fly? Pretty much getting anything is also difficult! I tried to order a cheap IKEA love seat for my cheap OKC apartment but shipping on a $150 item was $320 bringing a cheap love seat to over $500 with taxes…and they needed an entire month to get it to me. I guess they planned on getting it to me via covered wagon. A quick check of the delivery expense for the same love seat to CT came up as just $99 (bad enough!) When I questioned a co-worker about it, she one upped me with a tale of a Crate and Barrel couch that would have cost her around $500 to get to OKC. Instead she got a pick up truck, drove the 3 hours to Dallas, got a hotel room for the night and drove her couch back 3 hours to OKC. No inconvenience there! Dallas is also the place to go if you want to do any real clothes shopping and have 6 hours to spend in your car to do it. The shopping I got done in Dallas last weekend could have been accomplished with a 20 minute drive to West Farms in CT.
Oh people in OK will brag about how low the cost of living is and how great it is that there is no traffic and how they could never live somewhere else but the lesson of this story is that sometimes it pays to live near some shit. At least in CT I can have an entire living room set delivered to me in two days for $75.
I write this at 39,000 feet up in the air and Oklahoma City at my back! Getting out of the airport this morning I was reminded at just how inconvenient it is to live in OKC. The airport is somewhat small which would normally make flying easier. I guess if they had more than 5 security lanes for the thousands of people this morning or if security would drink a little coffee in the morning to get themselves moving a little quicker, that would be true. As it was I got to the airport an hour before my flight, snuck over to the alternate security not everyone knows about and STILL walked on to my plane just 15 minutes before take off. Surprisingly enough 4 other people walked on after me.
So what other inconveniences do people in OKC willingly live with besides almost missing their plane every time they fly? Pretty much getting anything is also difficult! I tried to order a cheap IKEA love seat for my cheap OKC apartment but shipping on a $150 item was $320 bringing a cheap love seat to over $500 with taxes…and they needed an entire month to get it to me. I guess they planned on getting it to me via covered wagon. A quick check of the delivery expense for the same love seat to CT came up as just $99 (bad enough!) When I questioned a co-worker about it, she one upped me with a tale of a Crate and Barrel couch that would have cost her around $500 to get to OKC. Instead she got a pick up truck, drove the 3 hours to Dallas, got a hotel room for the night and drove her couch back 3 hours to OKC. No inconvenience there! Dallas is also the place to go if you want to do any real clothes shopping and have 6 hours to spend in your car to do it. The shopping I got done in Dallas last weekend could have been accomplished with a 20 minute drive to West Farms in CT.
Oh people in OK will brag about how low the cost of living is and how great it is that there is no traffic and how they could never live somewhere else but the lesson of this story is that sometimes it pays to live near some shit. At least in CT I can have an entire living room set delivered to me in two days for $75.
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